Pictures of You: Art therapy, chronic illness and identity.

Art therapy a space for looking at all your pictures of you

'I've been looking so long at these pictures of you

That I almost believe that they're real

I've been living so long with my pictures of you

That I almost believe that the pictures are all I can feel'

'Pictures of you'

The Cure

Who are you now? Life in the Blurry Middle with chronic illness

I woke up this morning and couldn't get The Cure's song 'Pictures of you' out of my head. In fact it's playing as I write these words. Listening to it I have been thinking about one of the many challenges that people living with chronic illness face. Our health can vacillate between well and not well so often that it is hard to have a clear picture of who we are in the now.

We live in the blurry middle. Someone recently described it as being in constant detective mode and that resonated with me. Perhaps you can relate?

Chronic illness - caught between pictures of life

As an art therapist I deal with pictures. The pictures of who my clients are now and who they want to be. So often though we can find ourselves caught somewhere in between. Stuck in that liminal space between pictures of the past, present and future. Is it any wonder chronic illness feels like living neither here nor there. Not an easy place to live is it?

The pictures you hold

I want to share with you how art therapy could work with those past, future and present pictures you hold. The ones that you quietly carry in your head but can cause so much frustration and suffering. Let's begin with looking at the picture of you as you are now, living with chronic illness.

It is often this picture that brings people to therapy in the first place.

The Power of Art Therapy: Seeing Yourself More Clearly

What would your picture contain? How would it look?

In it we might see your daily struggles, your routines, your current coping strategies and areas of hardship or hurt. We might see the impact fluctuating health has on you life, your work or your sense of purpose. Your picture might show how ill health has impacted friendships, love or your ability to feel happy.

Why spend time with this picture of who you are now?

This picture needs our attention and you can take your time creating it. In therapy there is no need to gloss over the truth with 'I'm fine' or hurry past the realities of your life. We do that enough and it can leave us unattended to and diminished. You might've discovered that the ups and downs of chronic health conditions don't make for great conversations among friends. But in therapy you can let go of the fear of oversharing, burdening or boring others. It's ok to look at the darkness or sharp edges in art. You might be surprised by how much you have been carrying around in your heart with no where to put it. This is worth taking time over.

The art of bringing it all into focus

I know that it can be hard to look at these when all you want to do is leave illness in the dust. Why dwell? But, I guarantee there will be beauty and gratitude, softness and little joys. It may take time to see these things and let them come into focus. Sometimes our strengths and resilience can get lost when we think about life with chronic illness. We might focus on the flaws and take the talents and sweetness for granted. But without adding those good bits of your life into the picture we don't see you properly. Let's not overlook or reduce ourselves any longer. Your art is a way to take up space again.

Creativity is an act of empowerment

Of course chronic illness can be a picture of loss. At times it can narrow our world and our view of ourselves. Your task if you wish to accept it is to use your own creativity to expand your view. Use the art and the therapy to see the entire nuanced picture of you.

As The Cure's song suggests - we can be so close to something and look so long at it that we believe that it is all there is. If you are in this place right now - not being able to see past the daily struggles of chronic illness - I want you to know that you are so much more than a bunch of symptoms and labels. The picture of you as you are now is a very good place to start.

Until next time,

Stay creative

and should you need my therapeutic support do reach out. I'm here and ready.

Ellen